Those seemingly endless obstacles are trying to point you towards a new road.

When disaster strikes⏤a senseless shooting, a freak accident, a moment of horrible timing⏤you often hear people say that those involved were simply at the wrong place at the wrong time. That’s an easy way for most people to understand a totally random tragedy, chalking it up as a matter of cosmically bad timing. But what about a slowly-unfolding tragedy, like being in the wrong job or marriage, or being a member of the wrong team? A tragedy that unfolds slowly can be just as devastating as one that strikes like lightning, especially if it violates your deepest sense of self.

When it comes to relationships, whether personal or professional, how do you know when you’re in the wrong place at the wrong time? How do you know when it’s time to sever ties, and move on? Look at the evidence. The evidence never lies. If you don’t share the same values or work ethic, or are yoked to team members of unequal talent, then you are almost certainly working at cross-purposes, sharing the load unequally, or lowering your own standards by association. Don’t wait for flashing neon lights to tell you that you’re in the wrong place when even the smallest pieces of evidence will tell you everything you need to know.

You know that food is bad because it tastes sour or on edge. You know that clothes don’t fit because they pinch or sag. You know that you are on the wrong team when it doesn’t feel like a team, and you know you are with the wrong partner when it doesn’t feel like a partnership. You can smash a square peg into a round hole, and make it fit by sheer force, but that doesn’t mean the two pieces were meant to go together. You can drag yourself everyday to a job that you hate or to a relationship that is broken, but that doesn’t mean that either is worth being a part of, and sometimes it’s only the big tragedies⏤the heartbreaking ones that shock everyone’s senses⏤that really bring everything into clarity. The shootings, the accidents, the terrorist attacks, the natural disasters, the crimes, the wars. Disaster rings the bell of clarity in lives that aren’t even directly touched by it.

How you do anything is how you do everything. How you clean a toilet is how you lead a company. How you pack a box for shipment is how you develop new products. If you won’t do the small things well, you won’t do the big things well. Life is so very short, and the people you spend the most time with are the people you will become most like. As with sports, if you play on an average team that accepts average outcomes, you will likely not improve as a player. Look around you, and decide today whether the team you are on is the team that will push you towards excellence, or whether you are just another person in the wrong place at the wrong time.

Copyright 2023 Kesel Wilson (entirely, 100% human-created)

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